I was stupid of telling you everything..ihateit!

This particular post is not about me, my travel experience and it's not about the food I came to dine with but LOVE.

I've been in love several times.
and again, I am in love and at some point, I was accompanied by my own shadow, tears and my own negligence. All of these punishments I got from not telling how much I really love you, I chose to love you for almost three years now....

I always thinking about you {everyday}. Honestly, I really do and there's no chance at all that you did not cross my mind.  I've never thought that I will keep you in my heart for the longest time. I've never even thought that I will love you severely that I came to a point that I'd wish to transfer other locale. {damnit}.

I was the happiest woman on earth when you asked me for a "friendly date"! It's a big deal for me kahit friendly date lang but I did not know how happy I was until the date ended.  Days, weeks, months and years have passed, I was still longing for your attention and even of your single glimpse. What happened? I am totally clueless about what you think of me. It seems nothing have happened between us. And I thought, friendly - date nga lang pala.

I was hurt {deeply}. I was struggling to get over you but I just can't.....

I cannot escape from the memories of you, of that particular one -day that I was able to be with you. 

 

Maybe I was so stupid to think that one day of my life would be the start of our endless love together. I was so stupid to believe that we can possibly end up together. Maybe I was so stupid to say everything I feel and I opened up so much with you. I just trusted you. {but i was wrong}.

My big question is What Went Wrong?! I knew, I nagged about how you should treat a girl on the first date, feeling GF mo na ko. Most likely one of the reasons why you did not even bother to call another date. Yes, perhaps it was. I extremely regret that moment and wishing it didn't happen. I feel betrayed by my own feelings towards you. Oo, sinayang ko ang isang araw na pwede sanang maging habang - buhay at maging BUHAY ko! I will never blame you, you have no fault. For me, you're still the best for me and you're perfect man for me.  

But there are things that I cannot insist, nor control and there are things in which didn't work.  

                                                                                                   

You left me hanging and broken after that date. Was our timing wrong? I didn't know.

I hope someday, we will finally get another chance to be together. We will talk about our lives and our dreams together that we used to during that date. 

I know as you mentioned to me before that everything about your heart desire, is only yours. You never allow anybody to take it from you and know every inch of a detail about your love affair.  But I still do believe that in every rules, there's always an exception. So please, spare me. Let me know what happened during and after that date.  Let me know if I disgusted you or did not I met your expectations then.

I just want you to know, that in case you'll get across with this post of mine, I am pretty sure that you will realize immediately that this post merely pertains to YOU! 

I love you three years without even know until when I will love you. I care deeper of you than for myself. 

Kulang na lang magmakaawa akong mahalin mo din ako pero that is more than pathetic in my part, just...just don't let me see you loving another girl or else just kill me!
 
Mahal na mahal kita! I am still wishing for the best of our journey together..and I really, really miss you!!!!!


Love and forgive me....
Mitch