I was stupid of telling you everything..ihateit!

This particular post is not about me, my travel experience and it's not about the food I came to dine with but LOVE.

I've been in love several times.
and again, I am in love and at some point, I was accompanied by my own shadow, tears and my own negligence. All of these punishments I got from not telling how much I really love you, I chose to love you for almost three years now....

I always thinking about you {everyday}. Honestly, I really do and there's no chance at all that you did not cross my mind.  I've never thought that I will keep you in my heart for the longest time. I've never even thought that I will love you severely that I came to a point that I'd wish to transfer other locale. {damnit}.

I was the happiest woman on earth when you asked me for a "friendly date"! It's a big deal for me kahit friendly date lang but I did not know how happy I was until the date ended.  Days, weeks, months and years have passed, I was still longing for your attention and even of your single glimpse. What happened? I am totally clueless about what you think of me. It seems nothing have happened between us. And I thought, friendly - date nga lang pala.

I was hurt {deeply}. I was struggling to get over you but I just can't.....

I cannot escape from the memories of you, of that particular one -day that I was able to be with you. 

 

Maybe I was so stupid to think that one day of my life would be the start of our endless love together. I was so stupid to believe that we can possibly end up together. Maybe I was so stupid to say everything I feel and I opened up so much with you. I just trusted you. {but i was wrong}.

My big question is What Went Wrong?! I knew, I nagged about how you should treat a girl on the first date, feeling GF mo na ko. Most likely one of the reasons why you did not even bother to call another date. Yes, perhaps it was. I extremely regret that moment and wishing it didn't happen. I feel betrayed by my own feelings towards you. Oo, sinayang ko ang isang araw na pwede sanang maging habang - buhay at maging BUHAY ko! I will never blame you, you have no fault. For me, you're still the best for me and you're perfect man for me.  

But there are things that I cannot insist, nor control and there are things in which didn't work.  

                                                                                                   

You left me hanging and broken after that date. Was our timing wrong? I didn't know.

I hope someday, we will finally get another chance to be together. We will talk about our lives and our dreams together that we used to during that date. 

I know as you mentioned to me before that everything about your heart desire, is only yours. You never allow anybody to take it from you and know every inch of a detail about your love affair.  But I still do believe that in every rules, there's always an exception. So please, spare me. Let me know what happened during and after that date.  Let me know if I disgusted you or did not I met your expectations then.

I just want you to know, that in case you'll get across with this post of mine, I am pretty sure that you will realize immediately that this post merely pertains to YOU! 

I love you three years without even know until when I will love you. I care deeper of you than for myself. 

Kulang na lang magmakaawa akong mahalin mo din ako pero that is more than pathetic in my part, just...just don't let me see you loving another girl or else just kill me!
 
Mahal na mahal kita! I am still wishing for the best of our journey together..and I really, really miss you!!!!!


Love and forgive me....
Mitch

Read More

Bouquet of red roses - for ME!

One evening, when I arrived at home from office, my cousin told me that I have flowers.

  W.O.W! Ah, anu to joke!

It seems may nagkamaling bigyan ako ng flowers and this is the first time! hahaha, I felt nervous and excited, there were 3 persons who crossed my mind that time.  (feeling marami akong suitors eh!)

So just to confirm that it really meant for me, I read the card and it says, "Michelle, bigyan mo ako ng isang pagkakataon" and the sender's name followed.  Tama ako, one of the three guys I had in mind sent it.

So finally, bumigay ako. Saken pala talaga.

It came from a friend.  Well, that night before I go to sleep, I texted him and tell him honestly that I have someone in my life already and he knew that.

Thanks to my friend who had guts to face my mom and gave it for me sa katanghaliang tapat. :)

Read More

Chris and Mitch Wedding

Before 2010 has ended, I fortunately attended a very great friend's wedding. 

The couple

Mitch and I were friends since high school and we're attending the same church since elementary. So since I've known this girl that far, I was surprised to know that she's getting married to the man that I met only once (first met, during the wedding of our highschool friend also). Initially, Christian was not my type for Mitch.  He's like chickboy though. hehe..

The next meeting with him was when the wedding is being prepared already. So I realized, I was wrong with the first impression. Christian is such a good man and very charming. He used to make jokes and so we laugh.

The Bridal Car

I was thankful because I wasn't only invited but asked to be bridesmaid.  Oh di ba, what can I ask for...

The wedding ceremony led by the pastor ng Lokal of Quiapo is simple and yet very solemn. Maybe I was so excited being a first- time Bridesmaid, when it was my turn to get the ring to the ring bearer, I was lost where to hand-over the groom's wedding ring which I supposedly give first to the bride then she will be the one to give it to the pastor, nevertheless I still able to make it. hoooh!

Texto (The Wedding Ceremony)

Have a blessed family life Mitch and Cris

with maids of honor and groomsmen

Love is God's masterpiece to people.....
"Just happily married".

Congrats to Mr. & Mrs. Christian Sy.  We expect cute little babies soon.

We love you guys! :0 

RELATED POST:
After the wedding Ceremony, let's dig in to Dreemhaus Banquets. 
If you want to meet the bridesmaid, please click here. 
The Bridsmaid became a Make up artist. 

Read More

Impossible but it happened to me!!!!

This has been running for almost a year now and it was a severe HEARTACHE!

Anything is possible. There are things which are impossible. I know I have to live with the possible ones. But something that happened in me which I thought was REALLY impossible and yet, it happened!

For the passed months, I was in a controversy of making different status like I was in desperation, frustration and sometimes, EMO pa daw ako where all my status were like, pain and being hopeless. Pero the truth is, I am in love and I was hurt!!

It was not my first time to dream about a guy and when I woke up, I felt the "crush". But this one was different. When I woke up that particular morning from dreaming, I knew that it wasn't just like that, it was not just a crush that arouse me from that dream but it was something that won't stop there.............

The dream was persistent. Ang panaginip ko na iyon, ay nasundan pa ng ilang panaginip and I started feeling like, this is not like as before. I am in love again and it really hits me.

I let my friends know every inch of the dream details. I am happy that I can able to feel this kind of emotion toward the guy that I've known for so long but never did I even imagine to get across, even build a crush on him and eventually, falling in love with him.

I let the feeling grew deeper. Though I only see him quite often. We just talked if needed and when we see each other, we just shrugged our shoulders just like that. I never wanted him to be aware of what he is to me nor I wanted him to know my feelings for him. Because I know, the feelings that I kept for so long in my heart will cannot be appreciated and cannot be reciprocate. However, I let myself drew a smile on my face each time I see him, he really can complete my day!!

But time goes by and it came to me that he knows my feelings already for him, from a friend who is very close to me, she said that he has an idea. "So be it", I said. I can see nothing wrong from having a crush on him. If he knew, then let it be. Tutal, wala rin naman yun kwenta kase di rin nya kayang suklian. Though at the back of my mind, I was kinda hurting na and says, here I go again, falling inlove with the wrong person, masasaktan lang naman ako.

One day in October, while I was in the office checking for my new notifications, something popped up at the left corner of my screen, at the center of the three icons of FB. I opened it without any excitement. But when I saw who it was, my heart was almost literally skip down to my stomach!! As in, it was like my heart pounded ng sabay-sabay at super akong kinabahan at na excite!!

He invited me for a "friendly date"......and the rest was history.

After that date, I can hear nothing on him again..Seems like he did not enjoy the date or I was not really his type so he stopped from there.. Did he regret that day or he was just trying to have a friendly date lang talaga. No more, no less. No expectations whatsoever!

Until now, we casually talk when we have a chance to see in awhile. Parang walang nangyari ah!

I knew now my fault and that is expecting too much from him.

I was terribly hurt from being avoided and being ignored.

I should not have wished and hope for impossible...but I am still thankful that it happened...

Read More

Always beside you

I really love morning, morning with the one you love beside you, staring at you before the world sees u.I love waking up to someone and smiling and having them smile back.When you are cold, and you are sharing a blanket and you have their sweatshirt on. Your hair is all a mess and your breath smells and you nuzzle up to their neck and they nuzzle you back and wrap their arms around you. and you smile. And fall right back asleep.

Sometimes I wonder what I would answer if my friends asked me if I was in love with him or what traits of him that made me so in love..I am too scared to tell how are we as couple when in fact, we've never been one.

How I wish we were just like ordinary lovers, free to do all the things we want to do as lovers, endless holding hands and even public display of affection (PDA). But he is not a man for me, he may be committed and I was just like "another girl" for him. 

Read More

You..

I'm obsessed with you, I think about you constantly.

Sometimes I forgot how amazingly hot you are until you walk through the front door, I've never been so attracted to anyone in my life.

I love the rereading the box full of letters you wrote me

I love the way you make me feel amazing about myself.

You have such a cute butt.

I love that you make me laugh every day, and often so hard I cry.

I love when we fall with arms on each other's chest

I adore your voice, I mean I LOVE IT!

I love the way we share almost every meal.

You are my favorite person.

I even love that we can argue and fight, and then how we can make up even it take us 1 to 2 days.

I love how you wouldn't complain when I do shopping for mine when you were supposed I was escorting to

I loved going to mall and resto with you.

I loved when I followed you at Subic

I love it when we snuggle every morning during overnights.

You are the only one I ever wanted to be with.

You are my perfect other half, you make me the happiest I've ever been but you make me so mad too.

I want to take care of each other forever.

Love is too weak a word for what I feel -- I lurve you, you know, I loave you, I loff you, two F's

I loff you C,

Happy Anniversary

LO

VE,

H

Read More

Just another woman in love.

I'm strong, I'm sure, I'm in control, a lady with a plan

Believing that life is a neat little package I hold in my hand

I've got it together,

they call me "the girl who knows just what to say and do"

Still I fumble and fall, run into the wall,

'cause when it comes to you,

I'm Just another woman in love, a kid out of school

A fire out of control, just another fool

You touch me and I'm weak,

I'm a feather in the wind

And I can't wait to feel you touching me again

With you I'm just another woman, just another woman in love

So pardon me

if I should stare and tremble like a child

That "wanting you" look all over your face is driving me wild

I'm just what you make me,

can't wait 'till you take me and set all my feelin's free

I know that you can, so come be my man,

tonight I wanna be.....

Read More

I'm in love, again!

Just I'd like to finish this another blog, the more I'm longing for him..

I always see him at church. Wearing black, off-white and every color of polo he has. With every girl around him, young and old, women and men. I envied those all. Why I cannot do what they doing. Talking with him like nothing. being beside him like no one else seeing and laugh with him as if no tomorrow is coming...

I was kinda 2-3 years ahead of him. His birthday is Feb while I am fall on Mar. I cannot deny that he's always on my mind. I cannot erase him out of my system. I often wanted and even dreamt of him. It's like I would be burst for so much emotion for him but regretfully, he's so timid that you cannot imagine how torpe he is. It seemed he left me with no choice but court him!!! :>

He was our teacher at children worship service. Yesterday, in morning he's with us, taught biblical stories. In evening, he ate icecream as my lil blowout at church, he asked me to eat but too much to my imagination he will approched me, I sensed/ heard nothing!

Every little things he did, I always wanted to involve, too much of this, I wanted to be his own, his own LIFE!!

Read More